“I love that you get cold when is 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you and hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a crinkle upon your nose when you are looking at me like I’m nuts. I love that after I spent the day with you I can still smell your perfume on my clothes, and I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And is not because I’m lonely, and is not because is New Year’s Eve. I came here tonight, because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” Harry Burns, When Harry Met Sally. Surely one of the best declarations of love in a movie, ever!
Written by Nora Ephron (Sleepless in Seattle, You’ve Got Mail, Julie & Julia) and directed by Rob Reiner (Sleepless In Seattle, Bye Bye Love) this superb romantic comedy was nominated for an Oscar for best written screen-play in 1990. It was released in 89, and although I did not watched it for the first time that year, I have fallen in love with it and can’t ever seem to get enough of Billy Crystal singing from a karaoke box, in front of Ira.
The plot is simple; two people that become good friends against their clearly very different personalities, to later fall in love, but this takes them a little longer to accept.
On my quest to learn more from the movie that taught me true love comes from friendship, I found many interesting facts; like how the concept of Sally having an odd way of ordering food was based on the writer herself since she is a picky eater. But I’m not going to line up all of them, instead I will give you a list of some of my favorite lines from the movie. Yes! I can’t help myself.
Third argument in the car while driving to New York:
Harry, “No man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He’ll always want to have sex with her.” Sally, “So you are saying a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive.” Harry, “No, they pretty much want to nailed them too.”
Five years later, on the plain, Harry has another ironic theory about relationships between men and women:
Harry, “You take someone to the airport is clearly the beginning of a relationship. That’s why I have never taken anyone to the airport at the beginning of a relationship.” Sally, “Why?” Harry, “Because eventually things move on and you don’t take someone to the airport. And I never wanted anyone to say to me, ‘how come you don’t take me to the airport anymore’”
Another five years later, on a baseball game, Harry is telling his best friend how his wife left him for another man:
Joe, “Marriages don’t brake up on account of infidelity. Its just the symptom that something else is wrong.” Harry, “Oh yeah? Well that symptom is fucking my wife.”
When Harry Met Sally is about how love comes through friendship. Love is not an impulse; is not something you find in a gaze, or in a sentence. Love, real love, is something you find with time, it grows slowly and hardens with every obstacle you overcome along the way.
I was arguing at work about the differences between falling in love at first sight and falling in love… just falling in love gradually. Do you have to be madly in love with the person from the beginning to be able to still be in love with them years later, or can there be such thing as “love at last sight”? if that makes any sense. Maybe I’m too young to see the importance of love at first sight (wow, that sounds contradictory) But I believe that in order to keep a relationship going for so long, and to make it work, you have to definitely love the person and not necessarily (preferably not at all) at first sight. Just love them, respect them… be the best of friends. You could be falling hard, but without the feelings of friendship, that’s all you are going to be doing… falling. Then again, I’m only twenty-eight, so what do I know about love?
I’m sure there are many of you who disagree on this. There are even stories about couples that have fallen in love at first sight and are still together years later. These stories are even told in the actual movie -mind you, although the old couples were actors, the stories were indeed true. The thing is, its all my personal opinion and experience –however limited- on the idea of love between two people, and how a movie supports it… hey! Its also just my pick for the night.
When Harry Met Sally.
I got my info from IMDB: